3. Walkthrough (numbers in parentheses are points rewarded) =============================================================================== -Cutscene- During a meeting, a rather sinister group of businessmen discuss their next plan. While their plan to increase drug sales using subliminal messages in music has been a resounding success, a similar plan to increase porn sales has failed miserably, due to the advent of cable. Six months later, at a different business meeting, executives are brainstorming to find "America's Sexiest Woman," so that she can host their TV show. This woman, if she exists, has to be so oversexed that she'll find even the biggest loser in the world attactive - and here, you come into play. =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= = PornProdCorp =~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~- =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= You start off outside the office where the above meeting is taking place, with your boss, Mr. Scruemall, yelling for coffee. Grab the coffee pot by the door (1), and you will then automatically move into the office. Fortunately, you accidentally spill the coffee all over your boss - he now notices you as a big loser, and so decides to give you the task of auditioning the women. Of course, you'll have to do so inconspicuously, so Mr. Scruemall gives you the Rob Lowe model camcorder (1), which is disguised as a pocket protector. After he finishes talking, you'll find yourself back outside the office. Note that if you skipped the introductory cutscenes, you'll start the game here, without having had to do the above. You have several days to audition the three women, and must capture them all on your camcorder (which, you'll note, needs to be recharged). Take a look around the room, and have a drink from the water cooler (1). Also, I have no doubt in my mind that you've noticed the breasts-like object in the bottom right corner. Take a closer look at it with your eye icon (1), and you'll see that it's an award. Anyways, look at the hallway in the top left corner, and you'll see that it leads to your workroom, where you're employed as Chief Rewinder and Sterilizer. Head through and enter your workroom, piled high with videotapes. Let's put some tunes on before we go to work. Use your hand icon to turn on the 8-track player (5) on the left end of the counter, near the TV. Now, if you look at the big barrel in the top right corner, you'll see that it's disinfectant to be used before rewinding tapes. Problem is, you don't have your tapes: walk to the table in the bottom right corner and pick up the three mini-cassettes (6). Read the description for the tapes, and you'll see that they need to be de- gaussed. First, use your hand icon on the barrel to disinfect your hands (1), then use a videotape on the degausser machine (2), which is on the right end of the counter. Repeat with the second (2) and third (2) videotapes. Let's continue looking around the workroom. Open the leftmost drawer of the counter, under the 8-track, and you'll get your battery recharger (8). That's about all we can do in here, so exit the room, then enter the door in the top right. Once you've been able to pull your eyes away from the boobies in the top left corner, you'll notice that you're in the filing room. Immediately to your left is a desk, with a credit card machine on top of it. Use your hand icon on it, and you'll pick up the AeroDork Gold Card (5). Now, to get the files on the three ladies we need to interview. Looking at the cabinets, you'll see that all of them are labeled "Loser," except for the top drawer of the small one on the far right. Use your hand icon on the drawer, and then a second time to get the three files (8). Go into your inventory and use your eye icon to examine each of the three files, in any order. Michelle Milken's resume contains a napkin (1), Lana Luscious' contains a matchbook, and Chi Chi Lambada's contains a business card (1). Use your eye icon to examine the business card further to find Doc Pulliam's phone number (1). Walk down to exit the filing room. Before we forget, plug your battery charger into the outlet near the coffee pot (8), put your camera in the charger (3), then look at the charger. When it says that your camara is 100% charged, pick it up (1), and put a videotape in (4). Walk right one screen to exit the building. You'll be outside, and of course, you'll want to take a look at the naked woman fountain (1). Then, use your hand icon to enter the limousine. -Cutscene- During another East Coast board meeting, Mr. Bigg decides that his group will be giving money to C.A.N.E. ("Conservatives Against Nearly Everything), in an attempt to "clean" the airwaves. =-=-=-=-=-=-=-= = LAX Airport =~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~- =-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Shortly thereafter, you should arrive at LAX. If you look at the airport, you will note that AeroDork has eliminated travel agents - instead, tickets are purchased at the Automated Ticket Machines. One is nearby, slightly to the left of the nearby door. Use your hand icon on it to bring up a closeup view, then insert your AeroDork Gold Card. Your destination options, New York, Atlantic City, and Miami will come up. Our first file is Michelle Milken's, so let's go to New York first. Click on "New York," and then enter in the airport codes from your manual. What, you don't have one? Well, I hope you're not playing pirated software! Anyways, Sierra offers a copy of the airport codes at their website, www.sierra.com. Once you've entered in the correct code, grab your boarding pass (4) and your AeroDork Gold Card. (NOTE: You can go to any of the three destinations in any order you wish - I'm just writing the walkthrough by the order the files are in your inventory. If you choose to go to a different destination first, simply skip below to the corresponding section.) Enter the airport through the door just to the right of the ATM. If you forgot to charge your camera earlier, walk left one screen to the outlet and do it there. Otherwise, walk up to the Chartreuse Lounge door. To get in, you need to show that you belong: use your AeroDork Gold Card on the camera (9). There isn't much to do in the lounge; insert your boarding pass into the ABM slot to the right of the door (7) to board your plane. On the plane, you should see a blue magazine in the pouch in front of you. Get it (8) and read it (5) to learn some useful information. Not long afterwards, you fall asleep and start dreaming about Patti. -Cutscene- The dream starts off with Patti playing before a huge crowd at the White House - little does Larry know that Patti is only playing in a seedy bar at that exact moment. What's worse is, she's been fired and won't be paid! After being approached by FBI Agent Desmond, Patti learns of the increasing influence of organized crime in the entertainment industry. Thus, as a musician herself, she is recruited to work undercover and learn all she can about the subliminal messages. =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= = F.B.I. Lab (Patti) =~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~- =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Okay, you're supposed to take a look around the lab, before reporting back to Commander Twit. Do NOT talk to him yet! He'll automatically start telling you about the research, and you'll lose some points. Instead, click your eye icon on the researcher at the bottom of the screen, and you'll learn about the infrared heat-seeking surface-to-air vibrator (3). Then, look at the two researchers just to the right, and you'll learn about the double-barreled bra cannon (3). Walk right off the screen, and Commander Twit will say that he needs to take care of your indoctrination paperwork, during which he will give you a contact number, 556-2779 (1). You don't need the other numbers, so just ignore him; once he's done, take a look at the researcher to learn about the flatulence-inducing powder (3). Once the experiment is over, head through the door to the right to see Dr. Phil Hopian. Man, do I feel sorry for women - the gynecologist isn't their idea of a great time, I'm sure. Anyways, after you feel a little prick inside you and a couple of hours of screwing (no, not that kind, you perv), the Safety First Field Locator Device has been succesfully installed. After the procedure is over, you end up back in the lab. Near the computer where Commander Twit processed your paperwork, you probably have noticed some objects on the table. Pick up the yellow DataMan (5), the blue DataPak (13), and the purple DataPak (13). Alternatively, you can ignore them for now, though, and walk one screen to the left and through the north door. Back on the street, click your hand icon on the limousine to get in, then pick up the cellular phone to your right. Dial 556-2779, and ask for more information on Reverse Biaz to get a fax. Get the fax (13), then redial 556-2779 and Desmond will automatically send you a fax with information on P.C. Hammer. Get that fax as well (13), then exit the limo and head back into the lab. The faxes and the DataPaks all have the same information - the only reason to do the latter is if you want to receive faxes in your limo. Anyways, back in the left room of the lab (with the two doors), near the upper right corner, is the bra cannon you saw being tested earlier. Pick it up (6), look at it while it's in your inventory (2), then click the arrow, then the bra, then yourself to put it on (5). Note, if you went down to the limousine to get the faxes, don't forget to pick up DataPaks and Dataman. Walk through the north door to exit to the street, then get into the limo. In front of you is a chilled bottle of champagne - pick it up (6). Now, insert the Reverse Biaz DataPak into your DataMan (7), and you'll see that it now displays the address for des Rever Records. If you received the fax earlier, it's the same information. Anyways, show the DataMan or fax to your driver (8), and he'll start driving. -Cutscene- Patti starts daydreaming of some good times she had with The Donald Tramp on a yacht...meanwhile, back on the plane, Larry is still dreaming about Patti. As he's giving her a shoulder rub, he slyly unzips her dress - only to be awakened by the stewardess. Damn! Apparently, you were putting your tray table into the upright position, and not with your hands. The plane then lands in New York. =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= = LaGuardia Airport, New York =~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~- =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= You start in the Chartreuse Lounge. Walk down to exit, then sneak a peek at the charity cannister just to the right of the door. Noting that there is only one quarter in there, use your hand icon to steal it (5). If you walk down one screen, you exit the airport, but you don't have a ride! So, reenter LaGuardia and walk one screen to the right. You'll notice a row of payphones and two phonebooks. Unfortunately, the pages have all been torn out, so look at the partially obscured advertisements near the top of the screen. Two screens to the left, you will find one for the Checker Limo Co. (1) - remember the phone number (552-4668). Walk back to the telephones, and look for the one that is working (it should be the leftmost one). Insert your quarter and dial 552-4668 to arrange for a limousine to pick you up (3). Walk left one screen, down to exit the airport, then enter the limousine. As soon as you enter, you'll notice an appointment calendar to your left. Pick it up (12), then look at it in your inventory (11) to find some money and credit cards. Now, why did we fly across the country to New York again? That's right, to find Michelle Milken. Looking at her resume, you'll see that she likes hanging out in computer stores. More specifically, we have a napkin with the address of the one she likes to go to! So, show the Hard Disk Cafe napkin to your driver, and you'll be on your way. After you arrive and the limousine pulls away, walk behind the plant, and you'll automatically take a piss (1). Now, go through the doors to enter the cafe. =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= = Hard Disk Cafe =~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~- =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= The first room is a museum of sorts, with old punch card readers, tape drives, a music box (!), and various computer antiquities. Walk by the large woman hogging (no pun intended) the telephone and to the doors. Unfortunately, you can't get in without a membership tape, so talk to the maitre'd. You'll have to talk to him about nine times before he prints you up a membership tape (3), just to get rid of you. Pick up the tape from the side of the machine (4), then use your hand icon on the machine to insert it and go through the doors. You'll see your table right in front of you, next to the big woman's table. I hope you weren't hungry, because watching her gorge herself would probably make you lose your appetite. Sit down, and as soon as you do, Michelle Milken will walk by (3). After she enters the Herman Hollerith Room, get up and click your hand icon on the machine to insert your membership tape. Unfortunately, you aren't cleared to enter, so walk down one screen back to the first room. The maitre'd isn't going to upgrade your membership, so you'll have to think of another way to get in. Remember that AeroDork In-Flight Magazine we read? It mentioned something about computer punch cards being descendants of the music box, which this room has (in the bottom left corner). Conveniently enough, if you look at the music box, you'll see that its cylinder is the same width as your membership tape. It's pretty obvious what you need to do: use the tape on the music box (12). Click your hand icon on the machine to insert the tape, and you'll notice that it thinks you're someone else. Click on the machine in the next room, and while it unfortunately eats your tape, you'll enter the Herman Hollerith Room (12). You'll sit down automatically, with Michelle Milken only a few feet away! Go into your inventory, and use your hand icon to turn on the camcorder (4). You only have a few minutes, so you'll need to be quick. Talk to her five times, and she'll allow you to join her for a banana split. Talk to her three times, and she'll tell you that junk bonds would be perfect for you. Give her the DayTrotter with "your" account information (5), and she'll suck some whipped cream off her finger. Now, give her the credit cards (5), and she'll lick up a cherry. Can you imagine how much your woman would worship you if you had a tongue like that?! Finally, give her the cash (5), and she'll show you exactly what she has in mind. Michelle will get under the table and start going to town, while you're still recording all this (20)! After you blow your load (40), you'll find yourself back in the first room of the cafe. We're done here, but we'll need another ride; luckily, the big woman is finally off the phone. Pick up the phone and dial 552-4668 to call another limousine (2), then walk out the bottom right corner. After you enter the limousine, you automatically head back to the airport. -Cutscene- Mr. Scruemall, receives a phone call from someone named Julius. Julius doesn't seem too pleased, but your boss reassures him that "someone" is already on the job. =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= = LaGuardia Airport, New York =~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~- =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Shortly thereafter, you arrive at LaGuardia. Looking through your inventory, the next resume belongs to Lana Luscious, in Atlantic City. Use your hand icon on the ATM to pull up a closeup view, then insert your AeroDork Gold Card. Select Atlantic City, enter in the correct code from your documentation, then pick up your boarding pass (4) and card. Go through the doors to enter the terminal, but don't enter the Chartreuse Lounge just yet. Remember how your camcorder doesn't have much battery life? Now would be a good time to charge it. Walk left one screen, insert a new tape into the camcorder, plug the battery charger into the outlet, then the camcorder into the charger. When the camcorder is back at 100%, pick it up and walk to the right. Show your Gold Card to the security camera to enter the Chartreuse Lounge, then insert your boarding pass into the slot when ready to board. -Cutscene- After boarding the plane, Larry soon falls asleep and starts dreaming again. This time, he and Patti are riding through the canals of beautiful Venice, Italy. Just as they start to get a little closer...cut to Patti. She's being groped, against her wishes, by her sleazeball chauffeur! Luckily, she knows how to take care of herself, and gives him a nice right hook before exiting the car. =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= = Shill Building/des Revers Records (Patti) =~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~- =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Once out of the limousine, click your hand icon on the revolving door to enter. Look at the directory to your left, then click your eye icon on des Revers Records (3) to note that it is located in Room 900. There are no buttons to call the elevator, so go and talk to the sleeping guard. Show him your DataMan with the Reverse Biaz DataPak or the fax (6), and he'll call the elevator. After you get off, one of the first things you'll notice is the gold record at the bottom middle of the screen. Use your eye icon on it, and you'll make your way over there. Pick up the gold record (12), then use your icon on the turntable just below where it was. In the closeup view, use the gold record on it, press the forward button (third from the left), then use your hand icon on the stylus. The music should start playing - continue listening for a short while, until you get a message (3). Ok, so we just listened to the record in normal mode...let's play it backwards. Press the reverse button (far left) and listen until you hear the subliminal message, "Just Say Yes!" (3) Ok, now we should change the speeds - click on the 78 button on the far right. Wait until you hear another subliminal message (3). Now, press the forward button again and listen until you hear the final message (3). Press stop (Finally! That racket was driving me nuts!) and pick up the record, to keep as evidence. Look at the guy in the window, and you'll see that it's Reverse Biaz himself! He's ready for you, so enter the door to the left of the window. You'll be reminded of a contract you signed with someone named "Julius" (does that sound familiar to you?), who never even paid you. Anyways, click your hand icon on the keyboard to the left/middle of the room, and a closeup view of it will come up. Now, go ahead and play for a little while, until Reverse stops you. You will now have to do a second take, with a little "more feeling." Again, however, it doesn't really matter what or how you play. Finally, on the third take, the computer plays for you automatically, and Reverse is happy with the recording (8). You will then be invited into the studio to playback the recording. After he tells you that you have wonderful technique, use the champagne on him to offer him a few drinks. Once he's pretty drunk (40), he'll offer to find you a small sample of his work and give you a tape (18), even saying that every song is "subliminal." -Cutscene- Back at the F.B.I. Headquarters, Agents Desmond and Smith are scanning your location; however, they're having a little bit of trouble, due to a little bit of interference or, perhaps, your drinking too much! Back in the limousine, go into your inventory and click your hand icon on the DataMan to remove the Reverse Biaz DataPak. Insert the P.C. Hammer DataPak into your DataMan, look at the DataMan (1), then show it to your driver. He isn't going to try and grope you, fortunately, and starts driving you to K-Rap. -Cutscene- Patti starts reminiscing again, this time about Willi Gates. Even in that absolutely stunning outfit, Willi seems to prefer having his hand on his mouse and keyboard, unfortunately. Meanwhile, Larry is still dreaming of himself and Patti in Venice - and manages to spill his drink all over his crotch in real life. The plane then lands. =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= = Atlantic City Airport =~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~- =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= As anyone who's ever been to a city like Las Vegas (and, I'm assuming Atlantic City as well) knows, some people cannot stop gambling! Slot machines are found everywhere, and airports are no exception. Walk down one screen to exit the Chartreuse Lounge, then walk left. If you forgot to earlier, recharge your camcorder batteries. Otherwise, start playing the slots - the machine second from the left gives you a quarter (5). As in New York, we'll have to find some form of transportation. Walk to the right one screen, then look at the advertisements until you find the phone number (553-4468) for Tramp Limousine Service (1). Walk one screen further to the right, and use the quarter on the second phone from the left, dialing 553-4468 to call for your limousine (3). Walk left one screen, then down to exit the terminal. Enter the limo, then show the Tramp Casino matchbook to your driver to head on your way. =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= = Tramp Casino =~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~- =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= At the entrance to the casino, a blonde woman is standing to the left of the door, a man to the right. The man on the right can call a limousine for you, but you don't need one right now, so talk to the woman twice. The second time you talk to her, you'll play a number guessing game (2): type any number you want, and you'll win ten Tramp silver dollars. Enter the casino and click your hand icon on any free machine to play video poker (4). Now, I'm terrible at poker, so I'm not going to go into too much strategy about how to win. In fact, I'm not going to at all - I'm that poor at poker. So, I simply "cheat," by saving before every round, betting all the money I have, and restoring if I lose. Whether you do the same thing as I did or whether you prefer to play honestly, keep at it until you have at least $525. You'll need at least that much pretty soon, but don't go overboard with your winnings - they're not real silver dollars, remember? Once you've won enough money, look at the doors at the top of the screen, and you'll see that a crowd is gathering. Go ahead and enter, and you'll see a platform, with seats all around. Pay the bouncer 25 silver dollars, then walk towards the ring and you'll take a seat in the front row. The announcer will then introduce Jennifer Jiggle - click on her with your eye icon to look at her closeup (8). Once she's finished showing off a little bit (what happened to the wet t-shirt? I want a refund!), the show concludes. However, you find out that a mud wrestling match is happening tonight! Remember what Lana Luscious does for work? For now, though, we're done here. Walk out the way you came in, then down one screen to exit the casino. Back outside Tramp Casino, you'll notice the start of the boardwalk to the right. We know Lana likes to hangout there, so walk right one screen to get onto the boardwalk. You'll notice everyone here is on rollerblades - let's try to fit in. Walk right a couple of screens until you see the Ivana Skates shop, then click your hand icon on the door to enter. Walk up to the counter and Ivana should come out. Talk to her to ask about renting a pair, but you'll find out she wants a deposit of $250. Now, we do have enough silver dollars for that, but we don't want to give them to her: you know places like this always find the littlest thing wrong when you return their equipment. Instead, offer her your camcorder as a deposit (8), and she accepts. Note that you CAN offer her money, but you get less points, and she doesn't return all of it. Anyways, once you have the skates, walk down to exit the shop. Click your hand icon on the bench to walk over and sit down, then click the skates on yourself to put them on (3). Now, start skating around the boardwalk near the bottom of the screen, and try to run into Lana Luscious (6) when you see her (trust me, you'll know when it's her). You'll introduce yourself, and she'll invite you to sit down with her. The game will then move to a closeup view. Go ahead and paw her if you want, she doesn't seem to mind. When you're ready, though, talk to her five times, and you'll agree to meet her at the Mud Wrestling show (2). After Lana leaves, click the skates on yourself to take them off, then walk back to Ivana Skates and enter. Walk up to the counter, and click the skates on Ivana when she comes out to get your camcorder back (3). Walk down to exit the shop, and then left a few screens until you're back at Tramp Casino. Go through the doors into the casino, and then back through the doors where you saw Jennifer Jiggle earlier. You'll see that there is now a wrestling ring, full of - you guessed it - mud. Anyone know where they have shows like this, by the way? Anyways, talk to the bouncer, and you'll see that it's only $25 to watch, but $500 to actually participate. You want to participate, obviously, so click on him with your silver dollars, then choose "Lemme at 'em!" (12) He'll then step aside so that you can go down to your seat as before, but before you do so, turn on your camcorder. As soon as you sit down, Lana will walk into the ring. You'll then enter as well, and the camera will cut to an above-the-ring view. Now, this next part can get pretty tough - you'll see various body parts very briefly flash all around the ring. Your job is to click on them as fast as you can with your hand icon, which is actually alot tougher than it sounds. Keep at it (you'll know you're doing it right if the crowd cheers), and you will eventually wrestle Lana out of the ring, where the two of you start ripping each other's clothes off (40)! Unfortunately, "Bucephalus" gets a little bit of stage fright - and your camcorder caught all of it on tape (20). After that embarrasment, you find yourself outside of the casino. Talk to the man to have him call a limo (2), then get in. -Cutscene- A man named Luigi has just made a very large contribution to C.A.N.E., and although he wants the donation to remain anonymous, he expects to see some results immediately... =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= = Atlantic City Airport =~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~- =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Back at the airport, click your hand icon on the ATM, then insert your AeroDork Gold Card once again. Miami should be your only option at this point, so click on it and input the correct code from your documentation. Grab your boarding pass (4) and AeroDork Gold Card, then enter the terminal. Walk left one screen and put a new videotape into your camcorder. Plug the battery charger into the outlet, the camcorder into the charger, and then pick both up once the battery is at 100%. Now, walk right one screen, show your AeroDork Gold Card to the camera, and enter the Chartreuse Lounge. Finally, insert your boarding pass into the slot to the right of the door to board your plane. Shortly after your plane takes off, you start dreaming again... -Cutscene- This time, Patti is playing a rock concert in front of the Taj Mahal. In the meantime, the real Patti is currently standing in front of: =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= = K-RAP Radio (Patti) =~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~- =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Click your hand icon on the door to enter, and after a view of the other side of the building, you'll find yourself in the lobby. Luckily, the receptionist is nowhere to be found, so click on the keypad just to the right of the door. If you recall from looking at the P.C. Hammer DataPak before, the access code to the door is 45954 - enter that and go into the office (1). First, look at the plant in the top right corner of the room, and you'll see a glint of metal. Click your hand icon on it, and you'll pick up the desk key (10). Speaking of the desk, on top, you'll see a long, pointed object which turns out to be a letter opener. Grab that as well (4), then use the key on the desk to open it (13). Use your eye icon to look in the drawer (5), and you will note a five-digit number written on a piece of blue stickum. Write this number down, as it is random from game-to-game. Now, click your hand icon on the desk to pull out a confidential folder (5). Go into your inventory and look at the confidential folder (4), and you'll find some incriminating evidence, as well as the name "Julius." Of course, we don't want anyone to find that we took this evidence, so we'll have to make a copy of it. Walk over to the ZeroZ machine at the left of the room, and click the folder on the machine to make copies (12). Unfortunately, the machine jams and explodes toner all over you - at least you got the most important evidence. Like any good spy, however, you'll want to make sure you leave everything the way it was. Return the letter opener to the desk (we just picked it up for points), the key to the plant, and the folder to the desk drawer. No time to clean up the ink, however, so walk through the door on the left. While we didn't clean up the ink in the wall, Patti definitely needs a shower, so take one (7). Oops...it turns out the "shower" is actually a secret elevator, which takes you all the way downstairs, naked and without your inventory. Too bad we can't walk around with Patti naked, huh? You can't leave the shower until you grab the clothes hanging within reach (1). With your new outfit and the black ink all over your face, you look just like a female rapper! I'm sure some people probably got a little angry at the game at this point, but hey, I have to admit I thought it was kind of funny. Since you blend right in, you can walk around somewhat freely - go right one screen P.C. Hammer should be visible through a window, but ignore him for now. The second door from the right is Control Room B, the one we want - click your hand icon on the keypad next to the door, then enter the number I told you to write down earlier (the one from Krapper's desk). Enter the studio, and look at the red-orange shelf in the back. You'll see that it has some blank tape reels, so grab one of them (4). Now, at the bottom left corner of the screen, you should see the recording equipment, with a place to put the reel tape. Do so, then click your hand icon on the equipment (you should get a message that you turned Control Room C's volume up). Continue clicking your hand icon on the equipment until you get a message that you can now overhear 2 Live 2 Screw having a conversation (8). You'll have to record this, of course, so click your hand icon on the recording equipment where you put your blank tape (4). Unfortunately, P.C. Hammer notices you recording, and blocks your door with the microphone, before heading into the shower/elevator to get someone. While you see the code he pushed in, you need to get out of this room first! Let's not forget why we even came in here, however: click on the recorder to stop the recording, a second time to rewind the tape, and a third time to get the tape (7). Now, click on the equipment, and you'll raise the volume of the room's monitor speakers. Click your hand on the microphone, and then talk to the microphone to blow the glass out (15). You're free! Back in your limo, you fall asleep and start to dream: -Cutscene- There's Patti, frolicking in piles of gold, while some lucky duck gets to watch. Meanwhile, Larry is still dreaming of Patti, who's now charming a snake. Finding that the snake isn't the only thing rising to the occasion, Larry accidentally puts his tray in the upright position, and not with his hands again! The plane then lands. =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= = Miami Airport =~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~- =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Back in the Chartreuse Lounge, walk down one screen to exit, and then left one screen. There's no slot machines here, but there is a cigarette machine - walk over and click your hand icon on it to grab a pair of quarters (5). As with the previous two airports, we'll have to find a number for a limousine company. However, we'll also have to find a second number as well, so don't forget! Look at the advertisements until you find one for "Just Green Cards," (1) and note the telephone number (554-1272). Also look for an advertisement for North Beach Limousine Rentals (1), and note the telephone number (554-8544). Walk to the payphones, and insert a quarter into the second one from the right. First dial 554-8544 for a limousine (3), and since we're here to see Chi Chi Lambada, let's dial 554-3627 for Doc Pulliam's office. Since the line is busy, we still have an extra quarter, so let's go ahead and dial 554-1272 to call "Just Green Cards." (7) The guy on the other line will tell you that he's leaving the green card in the trash can outside, and that you should leave a large sum of pesos. We're not going to, of course, but walk left one screen, then down one screen to exit the terminal. To the left of the door, you should see the green card on the trash bin - pick it up (12), and enter your limo. Since Doc Pulliam's phone line was busy, that means someone is obviously there, so head for his office by showing the business card to your driver. You should arrive in no time at all. =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= = Doc Pulliam's Dental Hygiene Heaven =~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~- =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= After exiting the limousine, walk up to the stairs and enter Doc Pulliam's office. In the bottom right corner, you'll notice a doily on a table. Walk over and pick it up (5), then talk to the lady behind the window. You'll ask for an appointment, but she'll deny you and close the window, so talk to her again, and she'll ask you to fill out a questionare. Basically, you have to show her that you're the perfect patient, so answer her questions in this manner: - "Do you have dental insurance?" YES - "Do you have LOTS of dental insurance?" YES - "Are your teeth overly sensitive?" NO - "Are you allergic to pain?" NO - "Do you ENJOY pain?" YES - "Do you enjoy sharing your pain with others?" YES - "Do you enjoy mechanical objects in your mouth?" YES - "Do you enjoy other people's hands in your mouth?" YES - "Do you enjoy rubber in your mouth?" YES - "Do you swallow?" YES - "Have you ever heard of AIDS?" NO - "Do you know anyone who has ever hired a lawyer?" NO - "Do you know the definition of 'malpractice?'" NO Finish answer her questions (13), and she'll book an appointment for you nine months down the road, since it's not an emergency. Well, that's not quite soon enough for us, so let's make it one. Go over and pick up the phone on the left side of the room, and dial 554-3627 to call Doc Pulliam. Now, how to make it look like you're in alot of pain? Wrap the doily around your head, like a bandage (8)! Talk to the receptionist again, and she'll send you in right away (17). After you've been seated, who should come in to work on you but Chi Chi Lambada! Use your eye icon on her to bring up a closeup view. Go ahead and turn on your camcorder, as well. It looks like those beautiful breasts of hers are about to pop that button right off, but go ahead and click your hand icon in it anyways, to help it along. After a couple times clicking on it, it'll finally come undone (2). That stunt would get us slapped in real life, but not so in this game, so do it again if you wish! Knowing you, you'll be doing this for the next half hour, so just continue reading on when you're ready...OK, are you finally back now? Alright, good. Anyways, make sure your camera batteries aren't worn out yet. If they're out of batteries, restore your game. If not, talk to Chi Chi three times, and she'll mention that she'd do anything for the man that helped her become a citizen. You just happen to be carrying a green card, so give it to her (15). This will make her so happy, she starts doing a little dance, before inviting you down to her apartment (40), downstairs in the gymnastics studio. After the two of you do a little swinging, a little diving, and various other gymnastic feats, you emerge out of the studio. Unfortunately, you're not as athletic as Chi Chi might have liked, but at least you got it all on videotape (20)! Well, that was out last finalist, so let's head back home. You need a ride, of course, so walk back upstairs into the Doc Pulliams, and dial 554-8544 to arrange for a limousine. Walk back outside and enter the limousine, and you'll automatically head for the airport. -Cutscene- A group of C.A.N.E. lobbyists are talking to a politician...and offering a very large sum of cash, if he'll get the smut off of the airwaves. And, like any normal politician, he accepts. =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= = Miami Airport =~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~- =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Shortly thereafter, you should arrive at the airport. Click your hand icon on the ATM, then insert your AeroDork Gold Card. Choose Los Angeles, enter the code from your documentation, then grab your boarding pass (4) and card. Enter the terminal, and since we've videotaped all three finalists, we don't need to charge the camera anymore, so show your AeroDork Gold Card to the camera and insert your boarding pass into the slot to board. =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= = Flight to Los Angeles =~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~- =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= -Cutscene- As usual, Larry falls asleep shortly after takeoff and starts dreaming. This time, he and Patti are both in trench coats, reenacting a scene from the movie "Casablanca," I think it is. Cut to Patti in the meantime, talking to Agent Desmond. She tells him all the information she has found, from des Revers Records and from K-RAP radio. For all her good work, Patti is invited to the White House! Meanwhile, back on the plane... Larry's flight is going to crash! The plane is already in a nosedive, and since you've had a little experience with flight simulators (and since there's noone else to do the job), you end up in the cockpit. Click your hand icon on random spots around the control, and eventually, you will turn on the plane's Auto Pilot (100). You're a hero! After finally landing the plane, you receive a phone call from the President of the United States himself, and it seems like you've been invited to the White House dinner as well. =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= = White House (Patti) =~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~- =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= -Cutscene In just a short while, Patti is going to have the opportunity to perform at the White House. But who should walk in the door but Larry! They finally reunite, before going to sit at the head table. Agent Desmond takes the seat next to Patti, however, and Larry is left standing there like a fool. And who should be sitting to Patti's left is Mr. Bigg - or should we call him "Julius?" In his attempt to impress Patti, Julius mentions that he is looking for "America's Sexiest Woman," and things start to click for Larry. Meanwhile, Julius continues humming a very familiar melody, and finally mentions his real name - now things click for Patti. Julius is the reason Larry has amnesia, the reason "Leisure Suit Larry 4" was never released, the reason Patti never got paid, etc.! Patti tells Desmond to arrest him, but Julius pulls out a gun, while Larry dives to save the vice-president. So, what is Patti going to do? Do you have any weaponry on you? Of course, the Hooter Shooter. Go into your inventory and select it, then click on Julius (100). Good work - as a sign of his gratitude, the Vice President decides to send Larry and Patti to Camp David for a vacation. Well, that's the end of the game: you've beaten Leisure Suit Larry 5 with all 1000 points, so congratulations!